HAVE YOU MET ME?

Yes! I may not have the best functioning home 

I may not have so much money yet 
 I may not look so pretty                                                    
And I may not even be so smart 
            But I am me!
I don’t have your home, you brains or your looks 
But that’s simply because I Am Me ... The Best Ever!

I used to feel down, like I was odd and out of place in the midst of people. I thought every other person had a perfect life, I always wanted to be someone else until I had the chance to catch a glimpse of what their lives really were…

Kevwe  was pretty as a diva, had the carriage of a duchess, and pulled a crowd wherever she went. She seemed to have it all and though she was my friend, I avoided being close to her because I felt like a speck of dust standing beside her…I felt insignificant! Then one day I heard her say “if only I had a happy home like yours…” wow! 


Then I met Sonia … she was beautiful and wild, not afraid to take on the world and I thought “if only I was this bold and beautiful” until she sat face to face with me and said “you are beautiful, I love your eyes”. She was off the next minute but I stopped to ponder…she didn’t have any reason to want to flatter me so was she serious?

Well then, there was Dubem…he could sing for Africa! And I thought "I love to sing but will I ever be able to sing like Dubem?" My voice was too tiny and fragile, or so I thought, till I saw a replica of what I had despised, winning a music competition...

That was when it dawned on me that no one has it all. We all have something to be proud of as well as something we are not so proud of. The only difference is that they are fitted to suit our peculiarities and some people do a good job trying to hide their imperfections such that you only see the ‘perfections’. 
At this point, I had to call myself to order after some deep thinking … let’s assume I could become like all these people what would that make me? The second best of an imperfect being? That simply isn’t not good enough!  

Come to think of it, I had always been too busy checking other people out, I never really took the time to look at me.  So I paused to take a long look at me and instantly, I saw beyond my clothes, my shyness, my clumsiness to the real me, one who has all it takes to be content with being me. 

It was an awesome discovery for me. So I sat, and began to carefully polish the me I saw, so others could begin to see me too and I realized I could be anything I wanted. I realized how much people craved for my specific voice texture, only when I began to use it. Then I paid attention to my eyes and I could see what Sonia saw, I began to appreciate my family more regardless. And guess what, it boosted my confidence to know that I love what I have, and if people can’t appreciate it, then they must either be blind,  insensitive, or just myopic. Either ways, it’s their problem, not mine. Now, I am much more comfortable with me, just as I am; with or without make up, with or without a crowd of followers, amidst all kinds of opinions, I am unperturbed because this is me learning to live life being authentic, being who God made me to be. This is me not having to do jack, let alone trash, to gain someone's approval because I realize, my own approval is more important after all.






This is a tribute to those still living in the shadows of others, still struggling with inferiority complex. You are special and your world needs what you’ve got. Don’t hide it under mediocrity.

By Fidelia Ben-Udi

 

HAVE YOU MET ME?

Yes! I may not have the best functioning home 

I may not have so much money yet 
 I may not look so pretty                                                    
And I may not even be so smart 
            But I am me!
I don’t have your home, you brains or your looks 
But that’s simply because I Am Me ... The Best Ever!

I used to feel down, like I was odd and out of place in the midst of people. I thought every other person had a perfect life, I always wanted to be someone else until I had the chance to catch a glimpse of what their lives really were…

Kevwe  was pretty as a diva, had the carriage of a duchess, and pulled a crowd wherever she went. She seemed to have it all and though she was my friend, I avoided being close to her because I felt like a speck of dust standing beside her…I felt insignificant! Then one day I heard her say “if only I had a happy home like yours…” wow! 


Then I met Sonia … she was beautiful and wild, not afraid to take on the world and I thought “if only I was this bold and beautiful” until she sat face to face with me and said “you are beautiful, I love your eyes”. She was off the next minute but I stopped to ponder…she didn’t have any reason to want to flatter me so was she serious?

Well then, there was Dubem…he could sing for Africa! And I thought "I love to sing but will I ever be able to sing like Dubem?" My voice was too tiny and fragile, or so I thought, till I saw a replica of what I had despised, winning a music competition...

That was when it dawned on me that no one has it all. We all have something to be proud of as well as something we are not so proud of. The only difference is that they are fitted to suit our peculiarities and some people do a good job trying to hide their imperfections such that you only see the ‘perfections’. 
At this point, I had to call myself to order after some deep thinking … let’s assume I could become like all these people what would that make me? The second best of an imperfect being? That simply isn’t not good enough!  

Come to think of it, I had always been too busy checking other people out, I never really took the time to look at me.  So I paused to take a long look at me and instantly, I saw beyond my clothes, my shyness, my clumsiness to the real me, one who has all it takes to be content with being me. 

It was an awesome discovery for me. So I sat, and began to carefully polish the me I saw, so others could begin to see me too and I realized I could be anything I wanted. I realized how much people craved for my specific voice texture, only when I began to use it. Then I paid attention to my eyes and I could see what Sonia saw, I began to appreciate my family more regardless. And guess what, it boosted my confidence to know that I love what I have, and if people can’t appreciate it, then they must either be blind,  insensitive, or just myopic. Either ways, it’s their problem, not mine. Now, I am much more comfortable with me, just as I am; with or without make up, with or without a crowd of followers, amidst all kinds of opinions, I am unperturbed because this is me learning to live life being authentic, being who God made me to be. This is me not having to do jack, let alone trash, to gain someone's approval because I realize, my own approval is more important after all.






This is a tribute to those still living in the shadows of others, still struggling with inferiority complex. You are special and your world needs what you’ve got. Don’t hide it under mediocrity.

By Fidelia Ben-Udi

 

HAVE YOU MET ME?

Yes! I may not have the best functioning home 

I may not have so much money yet 
 I may not look so pretty                                                    
And I may not even be so smart 
            But I am me!
I don’t have your home, you brains or your looks 
But that’s simply because I Am Me ... The Best Ever!

I used to feel down, like I was odd and out of place in the midst of people. I thought every other person had a perfect life, I always wanted to be someone else until I had the chance to catch a glimpse of what their lives really were…

Kevwe  was pretty as a diva, had the carriage of a duchess, and pulled a crowd wherever she went. She seemed to have it all and though she was my friend, I avoided being close to her because I felt like a speck of dust standing beside her…I felt insignificant! Then one day I heard her say “if only I had a happy home like yours…” wow! 


Then I met Sonia … she was beautiful and wild, not afraid to take on the world and I thought “if only I was this bold and beautiful” until she sat face to face with me and said “you are beautiful, I love your eyes”. She was off the next minute but I stopped to ponder…she didn’t have any reason to want to flatter me so was she serious?

Well then, there was Dubem…he could sing for Africa! And I thought "I love to sing but will I ever be able to sing like Dubem?" My voice was too tiny and fragile, or so I thought, till I saw a replica of what I had despised, winning a music competition...

That was when it dawned on me that no one has it all. We all have something to be proud of as well as something we are not so proud of. The only difference is that they are fitted to suit our peculiarities and some people do a good job trying to hide their imperfections such that you only see the ‘perfections’. 
At this point, I had to call myself to order after some deep thinking … let’s assume I could become like all these people what would that make me? The second best of an imperfect being? That simply isn’t not good enough!  

Come to think of it, I had always been too busy checking other people out, I never really took the time to look at me.  So I paused to take a long look at me and instantly, I saw beyond my clothes, my shyness, my clumsiness to the real me, one who has all it takes to be content with being me. 

It was an awesome discovery for me. So I sat, and began to carefully polish the me I saw, so others could begin to see me too and I realized I could be anything I wanted. I realized how much people craved for my specific voice texture, only when I began to use it. Then I paid attention to my eyes and I could see what Sonia saw, I began to appreciate my family more regardless. And guess what, it boosted my confidence to know that I love what I have, and if people can’t appreciate it, then they must either be blind,  insensitive, or just myopic. Either ways, it’s their problem, not mine. Now, I am much more comfortable with me, just as I am; with or without make up, with or without a crowd of followers, amidst all kinds of opinions, I am unperturbed because this is me learning to live life being authentic, being who God made me to be. This is me not having to do jack, let alone trash, to gain someone's approval because I realize, my own approval is more important after all.






This is a tribute to those still living in the shadows of others, still struggling with inferiority complex. You are special and your world needs what you’ve got. Don’t hide it under mediocrity.

By Fidelia Ben-Udi

 

Under The Light

Have you ever had a wound and decided to cover it up immediately without airing it? Have you seen what happens? Yeah right! It gets soft, begins to fester with gems and before long, starts to get rotten. Now that is a really terrible thing as it could result in amputation or death worst still, which no one prays for.  But the thing is we don’t always have to pray for things before they happen, es

Under The Light

Have you ever had a wound and decided to cover it up immediately without airing it? Have you seen what happens? Yeah right! It gets soft, begins to fester with gems and before long, starts to get rotten. Now that is a really terrible thing as it could result in amputation or death worst still, which no one prays for.  But the thing is we don’t always have to pray for things before they happen, es

As flowers in the attic

They were as flowers in the attic
Lovely, young and innocent
But they were abandoned, uncatered for, no light, no water, soil was failing
Their only hope as it were, was more interested in chasing after the wealth of a prospective boo
She had lost her stable source, her beau, to the cruel hands of death
She could have been all they had, but she too was dead to them and those adorable flowers...they had no one
They fed on what they could find, played with what they could find and were everything to each other.
Oh, how they longed for light, how they long to play in the rain and run wild in the field
How they longed for friends, but no. They were stuck in the attic!
They, elder ones; a he and a she, played father and mother through sickness, sadness and hunger 
The younger ones; a he and a she, played kids, because they were really little
They all wondered when their nightmare was going to end...
So it was, that weeks grew into months and months to years, yet there was no hope.
Then father and mother figure began to think and work together to make an escape.
And as they worked, there was determination, synchrony, but then, there was also a fatal attraction...they realised there was something happening in their bodies, they couldn't quiet understand.  

She looked more beautiful, he looked more handsome, hormones were allover the place with no one to give understanding, no one to express to but themselves.
So they had played mother and father to their little siblings, carried out every single responsibility of a parent, why not this?
Then it began, they two, same blood, cleaved and became one.
Now they had become 'children of the devil' as it was said, but they didn't mind.
It felt so good and with time, it became normal
After all they were both mother and father
Thus, these flowers in the attic lost their glow, their pride and humanity, but were resolved to escape. 
With one dead, and others sick, they finally did escape from the attic.
Wounded from inside out, that large feastering wound of a taboo on their conscience 
Who could they run to, who would heal the wounds that ran deep beneath the skin right into the fabrics of their being?
What could be done about this contaminated blood line?
They were as flowers in the attic.

Extracted from the movie "flowers in the attic"

Questions
1. What is this story about?
2. How much do think this is affecting society?
3. Do you have stories to share? Please do
4. What is your proposed solution/approach?
5. Any lessons?

Written by Fidelia Ben-Udi

Very Urgent! Something every leader should know at this time.

Walking along the road one day, a sharp question was dropped in my mind “what if you woke up tomorrow and realized that the government has failed- No salaries, no food security, no power, no guarantee of basic facilities and amenities. What would you do?” It was so strong; I pondered on it and realized I had actually put my other sources of income on hold since I got a job because of time constraint. But what was worse was that I had stopped thinking about a certain aspect of the future, a certain aspect of posterity. I had stopped projecting in those lines and now I feel a certain sense of urgency to do what must be done. 

Have you ever woken up one day to realize there was no hope of eating through out the day? Not because you are fasting. Have you ever been without a single coin in your pocket for a whole week? Well it is easy not to think about that and hope that it never happens but what if it does?  Have you taken a good look at the environment, the happenings around? Have you seen the news? Have you perceived anything at all? If you have, what have you done about it? Maybe most of us who are still under our parents still believe they are magicians that would provide everything just by the wave of a wand. Or maybe we are waiting for the government? Well there are some things we can help ourselves with as individuals and if we don’t, we would feel the brunt more. 

For me, I have perceived a lot of things and the strongest of these perceptions in recent times is that a famine may be lurking around the corner. Hold on, I’m not a prophet of doom. But you can call me one if you think what happened during Joseph’s time in Egypt is just a fable. But I’d rather see myself as one who has a strong sense of projection based on deep perceptions. 

I’m not a farmer; neither do I know much about agriculture. But I see a lot of Nigerians resorting to farming. In my community presently, the average resident is a farmer of some sort. I see youths going into farming and I’m so excited. As a matter of fact I’m getting involved soon.  And you know what’s most interesting? A lot of the produce is being cultivated organically because we have fertile soils and healthy ecological systems and more people are becoming more aware of the dangers of inorganic farming especially when done inappropriately.

Good as this development is, I’m bothered about one other aspect of farming; STORAGE! We have had farmers for years, even when a vast majority shifted to white collar jobs, there was still a large number of farmers (small and large scale). However, I don’t see any storage facilities today and the plans seem to be taking forever. We mostly just plant, sell and eat up immediately.  There is need to take it a step further because according to the UN Secretary General, Ban Ki-Moon, “in a world of plenty, no one, not a single person should go hungry. But almost 1 billion still do not have enough to eat… ”  We all have a part to play. It is possible, but how?

The government may have a plan but like the question “what if the government fails? This is a call to youths and teenagers to show that we can indeed be leaders, to begin to think deeper. Don’t wait for the $250 million investment in food storage in Nigeria promised by the US to materialize first. Even if it’s in progress already, beauracracy may not allow it get to you and I on time. Well my point is, we should forget about being spoon fed and Spend time more on constructive chats and issues. Let every family begin to think of their immediate sustenance in the times ahead. Maybe if we think deeply enough, we would get an idea for sustainability of the entire nation and delve into other sectors too. But think about it, what would you do if you woke up one morning and there’s no food in sight probably for the whole week? Trust me, you would find anything to do in order to get food because hunger is a nasty situation. Stop wasting time on unprofitable things. Please read and act. 

If you have any ideas in this direction, feel free to share.
#food security

By Fidelia Ben-Udi
Make hay while the sun shines!