Growing out of the love fallacies

Defining love *Part 3

If love was just about feelings, the most emotional persons would have the best of it.
 If it was about fame, the Hollywood, Nollywood and Bollywood celebrities would have the best part. 
If it was about money, the Dangotes and Gates would buy it all up
If it was about words, orators would have all the love in the world, 
If it was about beauty, the most beautiful girls would have the most loving husbands, and family members. 

 
But no,
Love is patient, caring and kind in an unconditional way
It is about self sacrifice, putting the needs of others first.
It is not proud or arrogant
It endures and never dies
It is about easy forgiveness, it does not keep record of wrongs
No wonder love is the greatest!
A pity only few ever get to experience it

I searched a long while before I found this out; 'love has been greatly misconstrued'!
As humans, it is easy to fall in love with someone because he is handsome, he is rich, she is pretty, or can cook and you would not be crucified for it. But in our limited human minds, we stop at that point. So we get to a point where we just get tired and want to ‘watch a new channel’ (if you know what I mean). So we date about twenty different guys/girls before we decide to get married and when we finally do, we realize that our appetite for other channels still remains.  

So me, still wondering...at what point does love grow to the point where it transcends the cuteness, money and all to become unconditional. That’s what makes it love- that feature of being unconditional.  Not the feelings or butterflies or gifts. All those are mere fall outs of the real thing. So you can be tripped that he got you chocolates and flowers, but should you fall for that? Because I think that what you fall for could go a long way to determine how long you last in your ‘fallen’ state. I mean, we all pray for ‘true’ love, don’t we? So is it only meant for a few to experience or shouldn’t we all experience it?  
We all definitely should, and we can, but we’ve got to stop putting the cart before the horse.

How do I mean? Before ever you recreate a product, you must have the blue print and the best way to get it is to go to the original manufacture. So love is the product of a personality who isn’t cupid, who doesn’t have to shoot (ineffective) arrows of love. It is His blue print that says, love is patient, caring, kind, self sacrificing, and it says that love is a choice! No wonder He gave to us His most prized possession even when we didn’t know him nor value His gift.  Love is intangible and does give birth to feelings that are capable of producing beautiful thoughts when appreciated and reciprocated. We did neither but He chose to feel and think the way He does about us. We didnt love Him back, yet His love for us flourished! He made a choice to love, to forgive, to save us from our self inflicted evils. 

So yes, we must choose. If we must get the benefits of love as it is meant to be, we must choose to overlook faults, put the needs of others before ours, stand with them even when they have been naughty and forgive even when they don’t deserve it. 
Are you looking for love in truth? Then you’ve got to meet this personality and accept His love. Only then will you be able to understand love, cherish it and give it just as He did.
'He' is not cupid. He is God Almighty, Jehovah El-Romantique, love personified! 

So love is beautiful and very accessible but just in case your view of love hasn't been productive, you could try taking this in gradually, but if you are still too attached to it, you can continue trying to keep up with the fallacies of love that you’ve known and you won’t have to wonder why there’s so much heart break, home break and relationship break. But I sincerely wish you try taking in this new point of view gradually so you can break out of the prison of ‘the love fallacies’ and into the realm of unconditional love. If it is love, it is unconditional, and if it is unconditional, then it is true. ‘Love’ cannot be separated from ‘true’.

Set your heart first, to understand love then you can mean it when you say “I love you”.        

While we were yet sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). That is love!

1 Cor. 13

By Fidelia Ben-Udi